I don’t like being 24. I can’t be the naive i-don't-care attitude girl I was at 23. and I am not ready for the responsibilities of a 25 year old. Growing up is not fun and is not easy either and birthdays are a reminder that you are another year older. Another year closer to responsibilities. Another year closer to losing your life and living for others. Another year closer to death. And can it get worse than the noisy nosy neighborhood kids addressing you as aunty? I liked being 23 cos I kept telling myself that I am still on the nicer side of twenties ( no offense meant to those in their late twenties! its just that I don't want to call myself an older-twenty something). I can still tell early twenties for the next 10 months but someone told me that the months on the calendar appear closer than they are and that is the reason for all this cribbing…i am doing more thinking these days..may be this is what they call 'the quarter life crisis'.
They say what goes around comes around, a full circle. My kids would do to me what I did to my parents. I asked Ma why life has to go through that same vicious cycle again and again. I don't want my kids to not live up to my expectations and I dont wnat them to yell at me or fight with me. I also asked her why do we have to get married..live to keep people around us happy..abide by
norms of the society...take responsibility...and knowingly go through all that ordeal.... Am I ever going to get back 'MY' life again?
The ONLY good thing about all the thinking I had done is a heart to heart talk between mother and daughter and Ma told me that I lived up to her expectations and that she often tells dad that she is proud of me. I asked her why she never told me and she dint have answers!! typical mom ;)
And that made me a happy twenty-something :)
Comments
i had to accept and move on :(
Stay tuned.. to hear more about my troublesome thirties and frustrating forties! I know i am a big whiner!! :P